Prediction: the streets of San Francisco will be flowing with vomit on September 1st as truly empowered females collectively upchuck when a new service goes live that allows women to temporarily enslave men, actual human beings, to be their beck-and-call boys for a cost of $80/hr to $300/day. Shamelessly called ManServants and positioned as empowering for women, we can’t decide which gender this service insults more.
Part escort-style operation, part indentured servitude, part bad acting gig (our description, not theirs), ManServants is the brainfart of Dalal Khajah and Josephine Wai Lin, two female ad copywriters. They came up with the idea to deliver… what women really want, which according to their site, is “a gentleman who treats you like a queen.” Reminder: this is a site to supposedly empower women.
Dalal and Josephine’s answer to what they see as a somewhat universal demand from the female population is supplying us all with ManServants for hire. Do we laugh or cry now? Clearly recognizing how ridiculous this all sounds – especially in the year 2014 – the company’s site and video OVER-stress that theirs is a “real service.”
“To empower women to make their own rules. Rules a ManServant may then follow.”
Positioned as a kind of novelty purchase, a ManServant is supposed to be the empowered woman’s answer to hiring a male stripper for things like bachelorette parties or a girls’ night out. So rather than hiring a man to shake his g-string harnessed penis in your face, instead, you can now hire the same guy (fully clothed) to fill your champagne glass while you lounge by the pool, hold an umbrella over your head (and push your baby stroller) while out for a leisurely walk, turn the pages on your Kindle, or do shirtless push-ups while you watch (it’s all in the video below folks).
Since they’re all about “empowering women,” obviously, choice is a major part of the arrangement… as in choose what he wears, choose what his name is, choose his hair color. The founders say they “build each ManServant to suit your taste and interests.” We are talking about human beings, right? The added layer of choice comes in the form of letting women make the rules, which, of course, their guy-for-hire is then expected to follow. This is like a gender-flipped version of Weird Science… only real!
Of their ManServants, the site says, “He’s the life of the party, while making the ladies the stars of the show. He’ll serve drinks, light cigarettes, take Instagram photos, feed grapes, and goes above and beyond the call of duty to fulfill a lady’s every wish.” But, generally speaking, these are the standard services a woman can expect her ManServant to provide:
- Waits on you hand and foot
- Takes photos
- Serves drinks
- Gives round-the-clock compliments
- Acts as a bodyguard
- Cleans up your hot mess
Oh, what’s more… he’ll even be your sports announcer, and wait in the restroom line for you at a ball game.
But the ManServant duties don’t stop there. For an additional fee, a woman can choose the following add-ons: make him musical (“Girls in fairytales and romantic comedies always get serenaded with a guitar, now you can too.”), give him an accent, make him wear a tool belt to hold your “phone chargers, flats, vanity kits, and other (legal) personal items”, incorporate spa-like elements into your day, give him a pre-paid “allowance” to buy drinks or pay for cabs (so you’re not inconvenienced), chauffeur you around town, etc.
While some women (and men) may chuckle at the idea of ManServants (and the company’s video), think about what the public reaction would be if the same “real service” launched for men with a fleet of customizable WomanServants. Not so funny anymore, huh?