In a great piece of satire aimed at gendered marketing, Destructoid.com reported that the BIG news coming out of this year’s E3 Expo is “women are a bigger presence in gaming than ever before.” Microsoft, they say, is banking on this to be a clear indicator of more female gamers. So much so, that the tech giant has unveiled “Xbox wOne, the first gaming console made exclusively for women.”
As the story goes, the console is the brainchild of Microsoft engineer Bruce Alcott, who claims that he and his team “studied women inside and out for two years to build the Xbox wOne from the ground up.” He added, “Everything we know about women can be found in this system, from the bright pink console to the bright pink controller.”
Even the name was designed to appeal to women, according to its creator. “It’s an Xbox One, but it’s also an Xbox won as in women have finally won by getting their own console. You can see the ‘w’ is italicized because any product aimed at a woman must contain some sort of delicate writing on the packaging. Finally you can also see that the ‘w’ is lower case, which is a friendly little reminder to women on where they stand in society.”
Here’s one of our favorite parts…
“The Xbox wOne launches this fall and will come preinstalled with software that appeals to women; including Facebook, Twitter, Kim Kardashian’s Instagram feed, TMZ, Cosmo quizzes and Killer Instinct. The console also includes a feature where it will shut off if played for more than an hour at a time, because let’s face it ladies you’re never going to meet a husband sitting around playing video games all day.”
For women who don’t play video games, the new system even has something for them… “Boyfriend Mode.” According to Alcott, “We realize many females out there don’t like to play games, but will sit and watch their boyfriends play videogames for hours on end. Boyfriend Mode gives that experience to women who don’t have a boyfriend. Simply put in any game and turn the mode on. With Boyfriend Mode, girls can sit back and watch as the game plays itself, simulating what it’s like to have a boyfriend who completely ignores you as he tries to kill as many zombies as he can.”
And that, friends, is the use of well crafted satire to cast a giant pink spotlight on the intolerable absurdities of gendered marketing.